The body changes the story

We all know that looking after our bodies can help both our mental experience and our productivity in the world. But it seems to require so much effort and support. We need time and money to get to the gym, change our eating habits, or get enough hours of sleep. Often, the big changes in […]
From seething to focus

Do you remember the moment? For me, it came when I was in grade one. I wanted to love school and love my teacher. But the teacher who was nice to me was mean to another child. And once, she made the whole class sit on our hands as punishment for something only a few […]
Create reliable small wins

You probably think that practice is a chore, something you grind out because it’s necessary. You know that mindful practice with feedback is an excellent way to progress and you’ll do it. . . when you’re not so busy or so tired. That’s one way to look at it. Another way to look at it […]
How will that fresh start feel?

lots that is unfamiliar and some that is unwelcome. Starting is hard.
Sustained positive change requires that we get started. And it’s easy to start for the length of a TikTok video. It’s much harder to maintain the start through the weeks when you have to adapt to a new environment or build a new habit. It will probably seem that everything–and everyone–is out to derail you.
The fun-damentals of learning

It’s amazing to me that society has made learning seem so unattractive. Watch a small child, or even a small animal, outdoors. They are exploring, trying things, gathering feedback. They are learning. And they love it. Fast forward to the last time you filled out a course evaluation. The evaluation didn’t ask if you came […]
Gentle doesn’t mean you’re not tough

Our next series of workshops is called Gentle, Reliable Change. I had to think hard about using the word “gentle.” People react as if it means soft or nice or comfortable. I think it means something more like “in enough control to waste no effort.” We may think of the weak as gentle, but the […]
Three steps to understanding others

At its heart, and despite its complicated name, neurolinguistic programming is made up of simple ideas and practices. It wasn’t developed to fit a theoretical model or to gain status in an academic world. Instead, it was designed to allow ordinary people to learn and change more effectively. Some of the ability to make change […]
Holding the flashlight

Sometimes, we have to depend on ourselves to shine the flashlight so we can move forward. A bright spot in memory is like a spotlight on a stage: it shows you one thing in bright light and dims out the surroundings. To turn that bright spot into a flashlight, you have to point the light differently so that it helps you focus or move in a new direction. You can easily imagine doing it with a real flashlight.
Why Live Training Matters

Almost all of your thinking and communication is done by habit, not by deliberate choice. The best way to change those habits is with live practice with other human beings . . .